Posts from ‘April, 2010’

If only social networking was about 70 years ago then the world needn’t have gone to war. It could’ve all been conducted as status updates.

Every child wanted to be an astronaut, flying into the unknown reaches of a mysterious cosmos for the good of mankind. But reality bit. Now you can realize that dream by WINNING a FREE trip to SPACE. Imagine it! Time is ticking, so get playing to win!

Marlon doesn’t want to use the expensive butter, that’s for buttering toast not butts. So when you need to enter the missus through the back door entrance, a Value range suits all your lubricating requirements. Maybe get her drunk on some Value vodka to loosen her up a bit first.

You don’t want to be left hanging, do you? An embarrassing social faux pas. Or for that matter take a giant swing and then miss. And when and where should you high-five? Is it OK to high-five when you beat a murder charge? These questions and more are answered in this instructional video. *high-five*

Banned from YouTube for being too graphic, and if it’s banned that means I wanna see it. It has all the elements a good music video needs: Gratuitous violence, nudity and gingers being rounded up and systematically beaten, shot and blown into fleshy ruin.

Pedobear’s not going to like this one bit. But at least someone is thinking of the children. Won’t somebody - PLEASE!! - think of the children! I’m a supporter of this scheme, and I think we should go one further and just shut down the internets. Get rid of it all and let’s go live [...]

Don’t like Obama’s healthcare bill? Then have a listen to this British guy with his fugly teeth, NHS glasses and fog breath, and feel that fury.

This is Alex MacRae and he’s an “expert”, an expert at fapping if this video is anything to go by. And he’s got a vagina on his chin! Maybe that’s his secret, it fools women into thinking he’s one of them…

What are you doing, Dave? If you get elected you’re going to destroy the country, Dave? With your regressive ideas and idiotic policies, Dave? Fuck off back to Eton, Dave! Dave! DAVE!!!!

The game where you stumble about spilling beer down women’s cleavages before your wife drags you away as you scream, “I’ll SHOW YOU THE LIFE OF THE MIND!!” and quote random song titles, before kicking over the BBQ, setting the cat on fire and pissing in the punch bowl. Good times.

Ladies and gentlemen, David Thorne king of trolls, from 27b/6, turns his gift for a wind-up to the rich hunting ground that is Chatroulette.

How many Alzheimer’s patients does it take to change a light bulb?
To get to the other side.

Yo momma is so fat she goes KFC to lick other people’s fingers.

There are so many things wrong and so many things right with this. I don’t even…

You can keep your SpongeBob SquarePants, I’ll take Ms. PertButt G-String (and her buddy the chocolate starfish) any day of the week.

Looks like Mr Cruise has been at the “DRINK ME” potion; next stop Lilliput…